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Crush (Am I)

from Cycle by Melatonin Owls

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lyrics

Keep me grounded in here
Till I learn to fly again
Not all stories have an end
This one won't go anywhere

My heart turns to butter
Melted down, a slurry mess
Adrenaline shots please
Steel me long enough for words

I can see you sitting there
Where you won’t reciprocate
Even as the hours pass
You stay as a mannequin

Fix yourself with someone else
It ain't gonna work out
Like a band-aid made of flesh
Ugly scars for duplicates

Cause I won’t stay that long
If you leave me out all on my own
Without an answer, I’m telling you
I won’t last too long

There was an idea
Of us somewhere here
But it got lost again
When I tried to find your hand

One wanted privacy
Another wanted intimacy
Who am I supposed to be?
To make it last until the end

Cause I won’t stay that long
If you leave me out all on my own
Without an answer, I’m telling you
I won’t last too long

Cause I won’t stay that long
If you leave me out all on my own
Without an answer, I’m telling you
I won’t last too long

Now and forever
Hot and cold
Red and blue but never purple
Now and forever
Hot and cold
Red and blue but never purple

Am I, over-thinking things?
Am I, as easy to read as I think?
Am I, photorealistic?
Am I, am I, more than our small talks?

Am I, waiting for nothing?
Am I, one of those stupid boys?
Am I, getting closer to you?
Am I, am I, more than a distraction?

Am I, am I a mantra in your day-to-day?
Am I, am I found out to be left behind?
Am I, am I more than just a passing glance?
Am I, am I any more than a pretty name?

No matter how far you go, I will
Be the cause and wilts inside your head
No matter how far you go, I will
Be drawing up plans inside your head

No matter how far you go, I will
Be left alone inside my head
No matter how far you go, I will
Be dreaming up smoke inside my head

credits

from Cycle, released November 6, 2020

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Melatonin Owls

I used to make music.

Consider this page my resignation letter, farewell.

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